Moving on...

I have chosen to move on.

I am hoping my life gets better. I'm making changes. I hope I find a new job.

God is good. Prayer is wonderful. Church is a daily blessing.

There are lots of things I don't understand. I may be young but I sometimes wish people would communicate better. That's a large part of some issues I have experienced. I also feel that since I don't look my age I'm not treated right. I'm not really enjoying the whole growing up thing at the moment. It's much more difficult than I expected, if I had expectations. I don't even know. I just gotta keep moving forward. There's always hope. The growing up "process"...why so challenging...guess I have to live it one day at a time.

Really into a song by Josh Groban right now. The song is called "You are loved (don't give up)" Here are the lyrics:

 Don't give up

It's just the weight of the world
When your heart's heavy
I...I will lift it for you

Don't give up
Because you want to be heard
If silence keeps you
I...I will break it for you

Everybody wants to be understood
Well I can hear you
Everybody wants to be loved
Don't give up
Because you are loved

Don't give up
It's just the hurt that you hide
When you're lost inside
I...I will be there to find you

Don't give up
Because you want to burn bright
If darkness blinds you
I...I will shine to guide you

Everybody wants to be understood
Well I can hear you
Everybody wants to be loved
Don't give up
Because you are loved

You are loved
Don't give up
It's just the weight of the world
Don't give up
Every one needs to be heard
You are loved

a hard week...its not even over

BLAH
Seriously considering change.
I'm not happy where I'm at.
Can I be married already. Seriously. It's like 219 days away...come faster, PLEASE!
Work is hard and I want to get out.

Please pray for me. I'm praying for direction on what I should do.
I think it's time to make some decisions.

On a good note, last night I started writing a new song. It was nice to do, since it's been awhile. I'll post it when I'm done. Eventually I'd actually like to put my lyrics to music. That will take some time and help from my friends I think. Music makes me happy.

Thank you Jesus for putting lots of amazing friends in my life.

The joy of getting older and life

So I turned 24. It's still kind of strange. I don't know but it just feels like a weird number. I sure don't look like I'm in my twenty's. People always think I'm still in high school and here I am with a college degree. I had an enjoyable birthday. I got to hangout with a few friends and we played the Wii. It was nice. My fiance is always reminding me that I do better with less people. He's right. I only had 3 friends come over to hangout for my birthday and it was the perfect amount. I sure did wish I was able to spend time with my fiance but alas that will have to wait. So glad he'll be home in a couple of months.

Valentine's day, was more of a day to celebrate Chinese New Year, which just happened to fall on the same day. It's the year of the tiger too.
I never liked having my birthday so close to a holiday either and this year it just felt like to many holiday's in one. My birthday, Valentine's day, and Chinese New Year is too much.

I am thoroughly enjoying my new build-a-bear from my fiance. It's a panda. I love stuffed animals so it's the perfect gift for now. The perfect gift is him as my husband which isn't too far away. Still counting down the days...224 I think. I just want it to come already.

I have several countdowns going right now. It's kind of funny. I have one in my head for when I get to go to NYC to visit my best friend in April, one for when my fiance comes home, and one for my wedding day.

So we're expecting more snow and I'm not so cheerful about it. I love snow but I'm so ready for spring now. I want it to be warm already.

God is so good. I'm learning a lot. Growing in many areas of character. I was so happy at church today. I was just full of joy. It was nice. I felt all silly being so happy.

I'm hoping for an awesome week ahead. It's only a 4 day week so it should be pretty nice.

Getting a break

SNOW!
There's so much of it.
I think God did it on purpose. The snow storm allowed me to leave work early on Friday. That was nice. It was a tiring day and a tiring week. I almost didn't get a lunch on Friday. Well, I pretty much didn't get a lunch cause I left right after I ate something quick from the staff dining room. I had to help out with my student during my lunch which is my student's lunch period.

Skyping Josh has been wonderful. We've been skyping Friday night and Saturday morning. It's so much fun. I miss him.

Saturday was a very productive and relaxing day because I was snowed in. Working on my wedding stuff is coming along. I was not liking it a few weeks ago, cause I just didn't care and mostly cause I was missing Josh. Now I'm fine and I'm getting back into. I got to pick up my bridesmaids' dresses last weekend and they look awesome!! I'm so excited!! I think I got myself pretty organized yesterday with all my wedding stuff.
So being stuck in the house all day long yesterday made the day seem so long. It was weird.

Today was nice. Church was very nice. There was a guest speaker, a pastor from another church. He preached on Genesis 40:14 focusing on the word "when." The point he was emphasizing was that even though Joseph went through all these difficult situations, Joseph still believed that God had a plan and purpose for his life and we must think in that matter also. It was nice to hear and learn about. It made me remember Jeremiah 29:11 and also the scripture about "faith as small as a mustard seed can move mountains. The pastor also spoke about we only need a little spark to ignite our Faith in God. It does not need to be anything large. The sermon was a nice refresher.

I hope this coming week goes by quickly.